Justin Lin's Fast and Furious opens with an action sequence that would be right at home in a James Bond film. It's well staged, tightly edited, and sets our hopes up high for things to come. Then the whole movie stalls and never really recovers. Did the filmmakers blow their entire load on the opening? Sure seems that way, when you consider the number of action and racing sequences can be counted on one hand. There's a surprising amount of plot and dialogue in a movie called Fast and Furious, none of it very interesting or engaging.

The movie's big selling point is the return of the full original cast from the 2001 film that started it all. This would be exciting, unless you consider the fact that most of these actors never really went anywhere with their careers after the 2001 film. Vin Diesel never quite took off the way Hollywood was gearing him up to, and I don't think anyone had high hopes for Paul Walker to begin with. They return as underground racer Dominic Toretto and renegade FBI agent Brian O'Conner, respectively, but bring nothing to their roles. Diesel seems determined to show as little emotion as possible, and actually seems to be competing with Pro Wrestler John Cena in 12 Rounds for giving the most stonefaced performance in an action film in 2009. (Diesel wins by a mile.) Walker, on the other hand, is about as charismatic as wet cardboard, and has the personality to match. When your heroes have the personality of stone and cardboard respectively, it's kind of hard to find someone to root for. Nonetheless, the movie blindly trudges on.

The two are reunited when Dominic's girlfriend from the first movie, Letty (Michelle Rodriguez), is murdered by a drug cartel. Dominic comes back to the U.S. to seek revenge (he's been hiding out in the Dominican Republic), even though he's a wanted man and is risking his freedom. O'Conner is after the head of the cartel as well, and the two are forced to join forces since they're both after the same man for different reasons. Dominic's sister, Mia (Jordanna Brewster), is back as well to lend support, but spends a lot of her scenes standing in the background while the men glare at each other and exchange macho dialogue. The movie spends a lot of time on these two guys trying to get inside the cartel as drivers/transporters, but the screenplay by Chris Morgan (Wanted) never gives us a reason to care about anything that's going on. The strength of the franchise has always been about the cars and the action, and this movie mysteriously drowns itself in a simple and underdeveloped revenge plot that never goes anywhere.

At least when the characters get behind the wheel of a car, the pace and action pick up. Many of the sequences are done well, with a race through the streets of L.A. being the sole highlight after the film's opening sequence. Mostly, though, I found myself indifferent to everything that was going on. There's not enough action to offset the dull plot. The movie is total vapor. My screening got out less than two hours ago, and I'm already struggling to find things to write about as it rapidly leaves my mind. I guess I could talk about director Justin Lin, and how he burst onto the scene with the smart crime drama, Better Luck Tomorrow, and now seems content to throw his talent away on stuff like this. (He directed the last entry in The Fast and the Furious franchise, Tokyo Drift, as well.) But that would turn this review into a novel.

This movie's record breaking opening weekend all but guarantees we'll see a fifth film in the franchise. I can only hope it's more memorable than this one, so I'll actually have something to write about. I have absolutely nothing against movies that exist as in one ear and out the other entertainment. But there has to be something there to go in one ear and out the other in the first place.

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