Hey, hey, they're still just cheap Beatle knockoffs.

Daydream Believers is featured on Movies That Rock, which airs on VH1 every Wednesday @ 9 EDT. I used to watch The Monkees as a kid. As a matter of fact, I rather enjoyed the show. There - I said it, and I’m a better man for it. I found their antics to be obnoxious and silly, but as with most children, obnoxious and silly makes good television. Another factor The Monkees had in its favor was the music. My Aunt, who I saw on a regular basis, listened to The Monkees frequently, and thus I was accustomed to their sedate, sing-a-long pop sound. Davy! Eventually, The Monkees went off the air; I, in turn, continued to grow and evolve. Then, sometime in the mid-to-late eighties, the exalted media phenomenon known as MTV decided to run a Monkees Marathon; a weekend chock-full of nothing but back-to-back classic episodes. I was quite excited at the notion of being reacquainted with my childhood heroes, and once again, found myself thoroughly enjoying the program. Much to my surprise, the rest of America shared in my enthusiasm for 60’s nostalgia. Single-handedly, MTV re-ignited Monkee Mania, and the fever manifested itself into a reunion tour. Soon, The Monkees found themselves selling out arenas, making videos, and churning out albums of brand new material (we won’t even delve into those travesties). It was 1965 all over again. Then, after stretching their entitled fifteen minutes of fame into a full half-hour, The Monkees once again fell into obscurity. Peter! And here we are, face to face, a couple of silver spoons…no wait, I meant here we are, in the year 2000, and VH1 decides to rekindle the flames of Monkee Madness - another marathon; a new edition of Behind The Music revisiting the events that shaped The Monkees’ less-than-illustrious career; and finally, the coup de grace, the icing on the cake — a made-for-TV movie dramatizing the rise and fall of America’s premiere Boy Band. This time around, however, I have failed to discover the enchantment of The Monkees from my youth. Perhaps I’m old and jaded. Maybe I need to relearn how to appreciate the simple things of life. But to be quite honest with you, I now find The Monkees to be simply annoying. The show is plotless and bland, merely serving as a vehicle for the foursome to act obnoxious and silly, but unfortunately, not funny. Obnoxious and silly was good as a kid, but nowadays, they're not the most endearing qualities. Though there is the occasional rare laugh, these light chuckles are hardly worth the half-hour of your life wasted by sitting through an entire show. And like the program itself, the songs too have also lost their appeal. Though some are catchy and not horribly unpleasant, they are, for the most part, forgettable sugar-pop from the days of yesteryear. Why reach for the Equal that is The Monkees when you can have the full sugar flavor that is The Beatles? And why make a pointless analogy about sugar substitutes when it only serves in making the writer look like an ass? Like the music and the show, Daydream Believers follows suit in the fine tradition of mediocrity. It’s pretty standard fare, folks. Some top-level executives are pitched an idea for the infamous "Next Best Thing," this time around being a television show featuring four wild teens who make up a faux rock band. The premise of the program being: When the fellows aren’t rockin’ to a chart-climbing single, they’re out having wacky adventures a la The Marx Brothers. The studio will find four fresh faces that today’s youth (well, make that 1960’s youth) can identify with; boys that can ride the wave of the then-current Beatles craze. The songs will be penned by some of the biggest names in the industry; and said tunes will be performed by the best studio musicians available. With such a foolproof formula, where could things possibly go but up? Micky! So they place an ad in the paper, and after a lengthy screening process the Execs finally discover their Fab Four knock-off: Davy (the cute one), Micky (the wild one), Peter (the dumb one) and Mike (the tobogganed one). The foursome become fast friends. And even though the band doesn’t like the idea of not playing their own instruments (namely Mike and Peter, the two legitimate musicians), they eventually buckle, and the product begins to take shape. Sure enough, The Monkees are a success; not only in the ratings, but on the record charts as well. And as rock and roll history dictates, with success comes excess - discontent, animosity amongst the group, and the inevitable bottoming out. It’s an industry standard. At the peak of The Monkees’ prosperity, with two hit albums under their belt, the boys decide that they now want to call the shots, take creative control, and ultimately, perform their own music. Not wanting to anger the Cash Cow, the executives back the band’s decision, and turn a deaf ear to the pleading of the producers who, until now, were the very brains behind the project. And what happens when the inmates run the asylum? Well, in the case of The Monkees, failure. They cut an album of their own tunes entitled "Headquarters," and though it doesn’t bomb, it never surpasses the legendary "Sgt. Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band," which was released at the same time. The band then decide to make a movie in the vein of Help!, but with aspirations of conveying an important message, and a dream of establishing a new, more mature audience. It bombs. Now realizing their folly, The Monkees re-collaborate with some of the masterminds behind their past success, but find their efforts prove too late as Monkee Mania ends more with a dull whimper as opposed to the desired bang. Mike! As I said before, standard fare - but what really hurt the film was its lackluster presentation. It’s a bad sign when the opening credits are outdone by your high school’s video yearbook. The acting was dull and lifeless; I found myself not really giving a damn about any of the characters. If someone wasn’t an uptight, unlikable studio exec, they were, instead, a lackadaisical Monkee performing humorless skits and exuding zero charisma. I thought these bio-dramas were supposed to help us identify with celebrities as real people with real lives, not merely boring idiots who thrive on stupid decisions. I have enough boredom and stupidity right here, thank you very much. The one thing I did like about Daydream Believers was the trivia. For instance, I didn’t know both Peter Tork and Michael Nesmith were musicians. Now, Nesmith was an easy pill to swallow, but Tork was a complete surprise. Wow! And I thought he was the dumb one! And did you know Nesmith’s Mom invented liquid paper? No wonder he didn’t join the gang on the first leg of their reunion tour — the guy is loaded! The film also talks about how the first pilot episode of the show was the lowest rated ever by a TV test audience (later surpassed in 1987 by The New Monkees). What turned things around, however, was when the producers interjected the band member’s taped interview auditions at the beginning of the program — a ploy targeted at giving the audience a feel for each Monkees’ unique personality. Ironically, this is exactly the depth lacked in the film. How could they overlook something so blatantly spelled out to them? So in summary, the small details are interesting; but if you’re really in the mood for Monkees’ trivia, then by all means, check out their tale via Behind the Music. It summarizes their story, tells you all the gossip, but lacks the padding of the film. Aldo! And finally, why The Monkees? Sure, I can understand movies made about such music icons as The Doors, The Rolling Stones and The Beatles — but, The Monkees? Were they really that significant in the grand scheme of the illustrious history of rock and roll? Are we running out of big name stars? What’s next? "Everybody Have Fun Tonight" - Wang Chung: Behind the Music? I’ll tell you what, if I see an entire hour devoted to T’Pau, there’s gonna be hell to pay. When Joe Bannerman isn't frooging to "Last Train to Clarksville," he's either sweeping popcorn or writing about bad movies at Opposable Thumb Films. Date: 7/7/00 Copyright © 2000 by Joe Bannerman