Dracula 3000



Clearly Dracula is the most popular character in movies. There have been 2999 sequels to the original film? That’s incredible. I haven’t seen many of them, and I’m a little perplexed at how I missed the 350 movies a year that must have come out in the last six years since Dracula 2000 (2000), but I decided to catch up with the at the three thousandth episode.

Here’s all you need to know about Dracula 3000 – It’s Alien (1979), but with Dracula. Just take the script to Alien and every place it says “alien” cross it out and write “vampire,” and then just add the occasional reference to “Transylvania Station” and “the Carpathian Galaxy.” The characters are more or less the same, though the Ripley and Winter characters have been combined into one character played by Pamela Anderson-wannabe Erika Eleniak, and the Dallas character is supposed to be a Van Helsing and is played by department store mannequin-wannabe Casper Van Dien. Basically, a salvage crew that comes across the spaceship Demeter, but instead of alien eggs it’s full of coffins. Dracula, played by a doughy guy in a silly cape, bites one member of the crew and takes the rest of the movie off.


"A stake can kill me? No, you mean a "steak." Boy, I hate Ponderosa."

This is the kind of low budget horror movie where nothing terribly interesting happens, in this case because most of the film’s meager budget went to the cast. Besides Van Dien and Eleniak, Udo Kier shows up for some easy work as the captain of the Demeter who appears via recorded log entries. Outside of the cast of people you’ve almost heard of evey expense was spared, and it looks like the producers didn’t have money to finish the film’s special effects so the movie ends on forced bit of humor instead of a real resolution.

Posted: Sun - July 31, 2005 at      

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