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posted in reverse chronological order
original letters are in normal type, our responses are in boldface
As always, your site helps me pass the time at work. I've noticed over the past couple months that the Star Wars Christmas special has been popping up everywhere. The cult video store near me is promoting their possession of this evil little gem, and all sorts of people are talking about it. It is truly a frightening trend.
Anyway, if you are ever bored, feel free to check out my site, or perhaps even add a link to it if it seems good enough. It's called Teleport City, and just yesterday we finally forked over the dough for a domain name:
http://www.teleport-city.com
or you can go directly into the movie section:
http://www.teleport-city.com/movies
Glad your site is out there!
We've actually been reading this site for some time, and we're kind of mad at ourselves for not beating you to the slogan "Hitting you with the whole loaf of kung fu."
Those of you who haven't visited yet, we encourage you to do so -- it's beautifully laid out and covers some truly twisted cinema.
Subject: Star Wars Holiday Special Review
This review was absolutely, positively hilarious! Thanks for some really fun reading.
We're always glad to supply that. Keep reading!
Dear guys (and such),
Congrats on the snazzy "new look" for the index page. Could you please post an (optionally entertaining) explaination for the facelift?
regards,
Apostic
Every once and a while, even us guys at Stomp Tokyo decide to upgrade our technology. True, those "once and a whiles" tend to correspond to geological epochs, but we'll continue to try to keep our site somewhere within the range of accepted modern technology.
Hey folks,
I love the redesign on the splash page, it's a big improvement.
Btw, you should review the 1975 film 'A boy and his dog' aka 'Psycho boy and his killer dog'.
It's a post apocalyptic dark comedy about a kid (played by a very young Don Johnson) and a psychic dog (voiced by the late Tim McIntire) after the nuclear holocaust.
It's also got Jason Robards in it, which is a plus.
Ah yes, Jason Robards. The man whose name is synonymous with cinematic goodness. A Boy and His Dog is one of those films we've got on our list, but we'll have to be in that really desperate frame of mind.
Subject: Re: home page?
Cool. I love your site, by the way. I hit it very frequently, hoping for the next review. Hell, I don't care if I see half these movies; i just enjoy the reviews. I mean, I'm not going to seriously go out and rent Zoltan the Hound from Hell, am I ? ;-)
I've got a link to you from my site (offramps.simplenet.com) -- and I recommend you as often as I manage to think about it!
Word of mouth is important when trying to raise traffic on a website; we're really excited that so many people are linking to Stomp Tokyo. (And if you haven't, hop to it!)
Whattayamean, you're not going to go out to rent Zoltan? Was it something we said?
Subject: Beneath the Planet of the Apes
The mutants keep the bomb in St. PATRICK'S Cathedral, not St. Peter's. Just thought you'd like to know.
Love your reviews.
Cathy,
When you live in St Petersburg, like we do, all the saints just merge into one. You're right, it was Saint Patrick's Cathedral. We stand corrected.
I just found your site and it seems to be quite a little treat. I just get a bit confused by the organiztion it's not that easy to get an overview fothe content - but that can be a charmful thing as well. You don't quite know what you can find next. I'm going to link to your site in the next update of the site I'm helping to build up: violent vision. You can find it on: http://violentvision.home.ml.org
Hopefully the new design of the front page should clear up some of that confusion, Bjorn. Thanks for the link!
Subject: Great site, but no 'Evil Dead' Reviews?
Hi guys,
First off, this is one hell of a site. I have longed for literate reviews of magnificently terrible films for ages. And thanks for verifying that others also seek absurd titles and bizarre plot synopses when they visit the video store.
But guys! Even if you've already seen them, you *must* review some of the "Evil Dead" films. They are all well worth four lava lamps. Low budget, great script, the perfect mix of humor and violence, excellent direction and action... Ahhhh. I'm gonna go rent them all again. Any of the venerable Sam Raimi or Bruce Campbell productions are worthwhile. Please run, not walk, to the video store and give us your opinions. The great thing about Raimi is that he knows his films are B movies - so he makes superlative B movies. If he directed "Titanic," the bobbing bodies at the end would have eaten the survivors.
Although Bruce Campbell and Sam Raimi have been Scott's longtime favorites, it wasn't until recently that Chris saw Evil Dead II. After the experience, all Chris could say was: "Bruce Campbell is my hero!" You can bet that we'll soon be including the Evil Dead films in our review pantheon.
Subject: stomp tokyo's ratings
you guys really need to see some more films worthy of all 5 lava lamps. youve got 2. thats really pathetic considering how many movies you have reviewed. if needs be, go and review something like The Godfather or Lawrence of Arabia in order to get them, because i would really like to see some more perfect ratings on your page.
have you ever wondered how what it looks like, that you have reviewed so many movies but have only given 2 a perfect rating? i understand that its hard to find 5 star movies these days, but they do exist.
It is true that we have been very stingy at giving out five lava lamp ratings. And it's not there aren't movies that deserve such a rating. Scott would include Star Wars, Manhattan, The Empire Strikes Back, and The Muppet Movie. Chris would give five lamps to Casablanca, Breakfast at Tiffany's, L.A. Story, and Until the End of the World. And there are lots more.
Unfortunately, we have also shied away from reviewing movies that everyone else has reviewed. It's just not our thing. So it's kind of a catch-22: If a movie is good enough to give five lava lamps, it's probably been reviewed to death, so we won't review it.
However, we may be adding a review of The Muppet Movie sometime soon. And what with Kurosawa's death, we feel a need to review a couple of his films. We would probably give Ran and Yojimbo 5 lava lamps. So you may be seeing more five lava lamp films on the site soon.
Recently found your interesting site from a reference in the Las Vegas Review Journal "Neon" supplement of Apr. 24 to Barry's Temple of Godzilla. The "Inframan" home page under construction reminded me of a really "campy" series of English-dubbed Japanese movies maybe 10 years ago (my kid's favorite) called "Dynaman" which featured several characters fighting lizards and all kinds of bad guys and weird monsters. The fight scenes all were set to American rock/pop music of 60's vintage. The fighting characters seemed to use colored smoke bombs coordinated to their costume colors. Looked like an early prototype of the follow-on Ninja movies.
Does this ring a bell? I have a VHS tape of about 3 or 4 1/2 hour adventures recorded on it if that would be useful. The most interesting part of the series was to figure out what the original Japanese series was filmed for prior to English dubbing. Never could figure it out. Not sure the above series would qualify for a review on your web page since most others look like full movies, but thought it might be worth a try.
We've never seen Dynaman, but it sounds fun. We love all those old "Techno-Ninjas vs Monsters" type shows, like Ultraman, Ultra Seven and Spectraman. We haven't reviewed many TV shows, but we may start trolling video stores for episodes of shows like Dynaman.
I am crushed at what has been done to our beloved Godzilla. An iguana...an overgrown iguana!!! I am furious! A once in a lifetime chance to render Godzo properly and make him truely lifelike and they make him unrecognizable. If I were shown photos of that pale imitation 6 months ago, I would have said..."Yeah...nice beast....kinda Zilla llike but nowhere as interesting to look at. The dorsal spikes, his flame breath....all gone. On top of that, this imitator is only 200 feet tall. Big deal. The original, according to the professor was over 400 feet tall. What a stupendous abomination. Toho must be livid.
Actually, Toho had full control over the big G's appearance in the new film -- they had veto power over his new look, and decided to approve the new design by Centropolis.
We're not real keen on the new design, but it could have been so much worse. Plus, there are some of the toys that look pretty cool.
re: The Turning
Hey, cool site. Just wanted to let you know that I felt you were being extremely kind in giving that a one star. I didn't think it even deserved that much.
I rented it because Gillian Anderson was touted as being nude in the movie. I was gypped!!
Yes, yes you were.
Just writing to assure you that someone out here does respect your opinion of "Escape from the Planet of the Apes". However, I must feel there's one serious flaw in the movie that even you must admit - the production values. The whole movie looks like it was made for 70s TV.
You have a good point. Escape does suffer from having an obviously smaller budget that the first two Apes movies. But it made up for it by having a story that follows the first two movies, but it totally original. Planet of the Apes is almost unique in the fact that it was long running series of movies that continued to give viewers fresh idea and stories right up until the last installment.
I know for a fact that some crocodile species change sex... but they do so before hatching! The embryos start in a neuter state and then as they mature inside their eggs in the mound (crocodiles pile up a lot of leaves over their eggs), the temperature of the mound determines whether they're boys or girls. Above or below the range, and they remain neuter. (I can't remember if the high end of the range gets you a girl or vice versa.) Because some eggs are higher in the mound than others, there generally is a range of temperatures, so that on average the genders balance out okay.
This doesn't really help with =Godzilla= changing sex, but it does show that fairly complex animals can have a very different system of assigning genders. Besides, the poor guy is an atomic mutant....
We're sure that there's an explanation for Boy George in there somewhere...
re: The Tower
Concerning John Fogarty's "Bad Moon Rising" used repeatedly in this movie, if I remember rightly, he will receive nothing in royalties. All the early Creedance Clearwater Revival titles are owned by what was then Fantasy Records, owned by producer Saul Zantze (sp?). There is especially bad blood between them, cf the song "zantze can't dance." Fogarty was hauled into court once because Zantze tried to sue him for PLAGARIZING HIS OWN SONGS.
Fogarty and Zantze should have sued Paul Reiser for his rendition of the song in The Tower!
Hey guys,
STOP GIVING ALBERT PYUN'S FILMS CRAP!!!
OK, I admit not all of them are great, indeed most of them arent, but I think they are all interesting in there own ways. `Nemesis' is one of my favourite films. The result he got from an obviously low budget was terrific, and the film had some very good action scenes! I know that the sequels have been pretty lousy, but I think Pyun is the perfect director of B-grade trash! I actually COLLECT all his films on video, and already have most of them (no I am not sick in the head!)!
By the way, if you REALLY want to find a film of his to criticise, try one called `Vicious Lips' (or Lunar Madness)....It will probably be very hard to track down, but believe me - it's worth it...! It is SO bad it defies description....!
Glad to see that you like Tim Thomerson so much, a guy deserving of our respect..! Thanks for reading guys..!
PS - I think the GREATEST film of all time is John Woo's `Hard Target' (I am pretty much alone in this opinion!)....I have seen it over forty five times, eight on cinema..!
Far be it from us to suggest that you shouldn't enjoy Albert Pyun films. And we must enjoy them in some sick way, considering how many of them we watch. But so long as he keeps producing films like Nemesis 3: Prey Harder, we're going to keep making fun of him. Sorry.
re: Exotica
Dear whoever,
This may seem late now, but you missed the whole point of Atom Egoyan films... just as in The Sweet Hereafter his films are about dealing with pain. And in Exotica he uses an escapism/realism contrast. Exotica was a fantasy world and outside was the very gritty real world. Francis likes to be in a fantasy world to escape from his pain. Thats why he frequents the club, and he likes Christina because she used to babysit for his dead daughter (in the last scene) and he recreates that by having his niece "babysit" for him. He wants to protect Christina now, because he couldn't before and he couln't protect his daughter. So thats where his pain is. The pet store owner's pain is his loneliless. Thats why he goes to ballet and creates "dates". The ballets are his escapism. Christina's pain comes from having sexually abusive father/parents, the owners pain is from not creating a life for herself, for being "stuck" in a place and the DJ's pain is not being able to find anything perfect.
Canadian films try to set themselves from Hollywood films by practically being the opposite. Canadian culture is influenced heavily by Americana, most of films, TV, music come from the U.S. . So Canadian films try to set them apart from Hollywood films by focusing on twisted plots and storylines.They want to say "Hey, we're beside the U.S. not part of it." So they try to create something original and that will create a new genre that will get them recognized world-wide. And that has worked for the most part. Egoyan like another Canadian director David Cronenburg have a different slant on this by trying to have a polished Hollywood look while still having the weird plots that you have to piece together, or that are below the suface
So I hope that made you understand the film better anyways
This is one of the more intelligent (and polite) replies we've seen to our controversial review of Exotica. We do intend to give The Sweet Hereafter a chance, but we doubt there's anything that could get us to watch Exotica again.
Your site kicks @$$, no, no, it stomps the other sites. Just like Godzilla would stomp Kongs @p£ @$$. This program was on yesterday, MONSTER NIGHT on BBC2, i doubt you get that over there. It showed loadsa fights and Kong beat GODZILLA!? i don't think so. Anyway guys just writing to say your site is way cool. Keep up the good work.
James: We think you're cool too.
re: Godzilla 98
By far the BEST review, AND the most intelligent, that I've read. I, too, liked the movie, but the plot WAS lousy! This is in the genre that my best friend and I call "turn off your brain" movies. After battling the real world all week, we do NOT want to deal with deep plots, exploring relationships, etc. Just give us some gratuitous sex and violence, please! (Great FX is a BIG plus!)
By the way, I got to your site from "Barry's Temple of Godzilla." Intend to be a regular visitor to both of you.
Thanks for your patrnonage. Godzilla was certainly a "turn off your brain" movie. And compared to Armageddon, Godzilla seemed positively cerebral.
re: Halloween
Excellent review! I saw Halloween, in 1978, at the movies and was, by the end of the movie, utterly convinced that I had seen a classic! Have re-watched it many times and am always impressed with it. The music is spooky, Pleasance is good, Curtis excellent and Michael...wellllll! I loved the slow, inexorable pace with which he did things. He didn't run after his victims; he stalked them relentlessly! And the mask he wears was an excellent one; a dead look of utter evil without a trace of pity. The sequels had a few good scenes here and there but they never measured up to the original.
I also saw Psycho in 1960 and was pleasantly scared out of my wits by a great movie! In those days, audiences were genuinely scared by death-scenes; now the kids just laugh! What a sad commentary on the changing of values over the last forty years! A litle comic-relief is okay in horror movies but a truly well-done horror movie should frighten, not amuse!
There are a lot of good feelings going around about Halloween these days. It's certainly the most intelligent of the never-ending horror franchises, which is probably the reason we were drawn to watch and review all of them in the first place. Now we have to find a new franchise to watch. Hmmm ... Freddy? Jason? Poltergeist? Decisions, decisions...
Subject: Yep, more slogans.
Stomp Tokyo: What, No Fargo!?
Stomp Tokyo: 99.44% Bridges Brothers free.
Stomp Tokyo: You're Darn Tootin' We're Right
Actually, we really like Jeff Bridges. Maybe it should be "99.44% Baldwin Brothers free."
re: Exotica
Sorry to bother you but I just finished reading your review of Exotica and just couldn't help it. What exactly is the point in sticking the review in the Art-genre category and then reviewing it as a T&A thriller? You seem to blame the filmmakers for promissing the T&A thriller and then not delivering when they did no such thing. I saw the movie more than once and didn't see anything thrilling in it. That's because there isn't supposed be anything thrilling in it. Not being an expert, my best guess is that Exotica is supposed to be a somewhat Altman-ish psychological drama. The characters' motivations and all the rest that the reviewers didn't seem to understand were all explained during the film itself and there shouldn't be a problem understanding them after the first viewing. I would have suggested to re-review this film and/or The Sweet Hereafter, but that would probably be a waste of money.
Read the next letter and our reply for more on Exotica.
re: Exotica
Just what kind of movies are you guys looking for? YOur review of Exotica, while attempting to be critical, underlines your shallow ability to comprehend. Obviously you expect to have the plot, characters and theme figured out before the end credits so as to have nothing to chew on for the ride home but the stray popcorn kernels in your teeth. Welcome to the world of film as art my friends. If you want an erection try porn; if you want a thrill try Jon Woo, neither will trouble your brain at all. But for those of us who want a little more than bombs, tits and Tarantino rigmarole, we'll stick to something intelligent and thought provoking like Exotica.
Before my rant is over: The "eh" that follows any reference to Canada is so over done. How 'bout faking a little bit of creativity and imagiantion and ask somebody for another way to poke fun at Canadians.
Make fun of Canadians? We don't know what you're talking aboot.
What kind of movies are we looking for? The same kind of movies everyone is looking for. Entertaining ones. If a movie doesn't entertain, on some level, then it has no reason to exist.
We've gotten quite a lot of mail about Exotica. Most of it disagreed with our review, though no one else felt the need to be quite as rude as this one. We've gotten some supporting e-mails as well, and that's really the way it should be.
This writer seems to imply that good movies have to be abstract... Or is it that all abstract movies are good? Either proposition is unworkable to us. We like some abstract filmmakers, notably Shinya Tsukamoto and David Lynch. But we didn't "understand" Lost Highway, and we didn't like it much. On the other hand, we didn't understand the end of Tokyo Fist either, and we loved that film. So we would say there is more going on than just comprehension. And that would be, again, entertainment.
On another topic, when was the law passed that said you have to like one kind of the film or the other? We like Tarantino and John Woo. We like Alex Proyas and David Cronenberg. We enjoyed Pulp Fiction and Dark City. We are big fans of The Killer (which was based on an abstract film, Le Samorai, BTW) and Naked Lunch.
But we still didn't like Exotica, and we doubt we ever will. We're sorry that Exotica is the yardstick by which this writer judges character, but it's really just a movie. Our review reflects our OPINION of the film, and everyone is entitled to an opinion, even if it disagrees with yours.
re: The Lonely Lady
To whom it may concern,
people didn't look at the film the way i did, I thought it was in my eyes very good!
I can reflect the theme of the movie to my own life, growing up abused and strugling for a life that would make me happy. Pia was a young girl trying to make it in life, in a world where she didn't fit. please look at the story they was trying to tell. Maybe nobody will agree with me but everybody has a right to their opinions.
I wish I could find a poster of Pia because to me she is a fine lady that nobody gave a chance. The Lonely Lady to me should be a classic.
To you, The Lonely Lady IS a classic. To us, it's the worst movie ever made. See our comments on Exotica above for more on this subject.
re: The Wicker Man
I totally agree with your fine review of the movie, as my mind is still holding images from it as I watched it last night. I hadn't seen the movie in years and was surprised to find a copy of it for sale in the video store. My vague recollection of the movie as a kid was of Lord Summerisle and the climax, however the movie was on TV and the striking Britt Ekland's dance scene was obviously omitted, also due to my youth I probably just didn't get it. That being said, I feel "The Wicker Man" is an absolute gem and really holds up. I too, found the music quite catching yet, eerie. FYI, I have the 84 minute version that was released in the USA by Republic Pictures, 12636 Beatrice Street, Los Angeles, CA 90066-0930. I hope this helps!
We recently found the longer version of the film at a video store. The 100 minute version was released by Magnum video, and is strikingly different that the Republic version. We may re-write our review of The Wicker Man to reflect the longer version.
re: my Halloween theory
My theory is that Laurie strode faked her death, changed her name and left her daughter with a foster family because she did not want Myers to find her and kill her. After changing her name, Laurie went on to live a normal life (well, as normal as possible). Then her life is picked up in Halloween H20. Or, the makers of H20 could have done what happened to Godzilla, the ignored every movie after Halloween up till H20. What do think?
We've seen H20 and it ignores Halloweens 4 - 6. But it does have some nods towards plot points from the films it "retconned" out of existence, such Loomis' apparent survival of the explosion at the end of Halloween 2.
To Whomever ---I am a fan of Disney Animation.I hope you like some other of its films as I do.But it's fair to note that despite being a master in the animated-movie field,Disney can have problems.I never have seen the long-lost movie "The Black Cauldron",at least not yet.I often have felt tempted to see the film to see why people have made a fuss over it,and how it could be a failure.I've seen commercials for the movie on video,and maybe it's my imagination,but the animation didn't seem as inspired and at some scenes not as convincing as in other Disney cartoons.
I have also read ona couple of book on Disney that the animators faced creative differences with the film-makers during production,they worked in seprate units,and a lot of ideas for the film were left out.Morale over the production was low."The Black Cauldron" was critized by many for having dull characters and a weak sense of story.Despite all that,and the film's financal nightmares,it has had few admirers.But I have nothing much to say on the matter since I didn't see it
.At least Disney animators were able to crawl out of the rubble and start anew in better,more artisitically revoltlutionary animations in recent years.By the way,this is a long lost film for 13 years since its only and initial release.You reviewed it before it got on video.How'd you get you hands on it!?
Also,there's rumors on one website that the video version was reworked a bit in Disney's Paris studio,so it'll be more G-rated and it has unlike before a musical number.But I haven't heard more on that. Thanks for recieving my message,although a rather long one.
Where did we see The Black Cauldron? Seeing as we at Stomp Tokyo would never buy pirated tapes, the only reasonable answer is that we used our formidable psychic powers to view the film on the astral plane. And we brought back hazy video captures too!
As of this writing, we haven't seen the new Disney version to determine if Disney re-edited it. Anyone having information on this should write us. We'd love to hear all about it!
re: School Daze
I strongly disagree with your review of this movie. School Daze, albeit an early example of Spike's work, shines through with its expose' of life at historical black universities. I first saw this movie before attending Fisk University in Nashville, TN and at that time I could honestly say that my perspective was narrow because I did not at that time have the privilege of attending a HBCU. Now, as a graduate of such an institution -- I see the wisdom of the movie. The internal conflicts which can be readily understood by all blacks and that same conflict which HBCU educated blacks are privy to. School Daze is my all time favorite movie and I strongly recommend it to anyone who has not had the pleasure of seeing it. I have looked all over to purchase this film, which is the reason why I am on this website now, just so I can add this classic to my collection.
As we recall, our review of School Daze wasn't that bad. While we concede that actually being a graduate of such an institution would enhance your appreciation of this film, we stand by our review. Lee hadn't quite hit his stride in this movie, which is not to say that he didn't make some excellent films later. We are much more enamored of Spike Lee's Do The Right Thing, among others. We'll revisit Lee in some future reviews.
No one seems to have noticed that the "natives" in this movie -- who have never encountered outsiders, right? -- speak New Guinea pidgin. That is, fractured English. Listen carefully: you can undestand everything they say. By the way: great reviews. And thanks for bringing some sanity to the New Godzilla Debate -- it pains me to hear die-hard G-fans complaining about superficial characterizations and continuity lapses...
We never noticed the pidgin English of the natives. We were probably distracted by the translator's bizare changes is voice pitch in the American version. Deep and confident when speaking to the natives, high and cartoony when talking to the Japanese.
Thanks for the kind words about our review of Godzilla (1998). We always strive for sanity in our writing... Toys in the attic, red rum, Ia Shub Niggrath!
RE: Halloween
Unfortunately, you never saw said movie in a theater. I can honestly say that the movie scared the living shit out of me. (I was 18 at the time. I'm also male) Never had I ever seen a film with such clenching, nervous, agitating suspense as this. I also never saw a film with that eerie blue lighting that is so commonplace in dark slasher films now. And the music set everything up so well. I went with a friend, before any of the reviews came out, and sat in a theater with about 30 people. Suffice to say the theater was fairly empty, but I know that everyone in there left the theater numb. I was scared to enter my car at night for days. This is arguably Carpenter's best film. I love it for it's low-budget, and for the mystique that Donald Pleasance conveys about that ultimate evil incarnate, Micheal Meyers.
There's no question that Halloween is one of the premiere horror films in recent history. Perhaps that's why a 20th Anniversary film, working title H20, is currently in production with Jamie Lee Curtis starring. Hopefully we'll get to feel some of that creepiness in the theater runs of this production.
did godzilla ever fight gamora or any giant turtle?
As far as we know, there has never been an official matchup between Gamera and Godzilla, or between Godzilla and any other turtle-type creature. Perhaps the closest is Angorus, because he's four-legged and has a shell. But the similarity stops there.
RE: Are You In The House Alone?
Has it already been pointed out 83 times? It looks like Dennis Quaid, and it's called Dennis Quaid, but it's captioned and quoted to as Randy Quaid. "Error! Error!"
Keep up the otherwise stellar work. I really dig your reviews-- they are extremely amusing and well-written. Except for this one. Sorry.
Jane, you caught us. It is indeed Dennis Quaid, and our stumbling fingers just kept typing Randy! We've fixed that particular problem. Keep reading!
I never quite understood why people always look down upon this movie...I consider it probably the best Godzilla movie out of the classic series except for the original.
Aliens portrayed in a poor way? yeah, I'll buy that. Lots of stock footage, yeah that too mind you the budget. The pyrotechnics were simply amazing though, something that Tsubaraya never did accomplish. Silly monster fighting? I'd like to call it probably the best choreographed kaijuu battle that has ever been filmed.
The atmosphere of the film is unparalled; dark, moody, hopelessness. The idea of the Godzilla tower nearly killing Godzilla was done excellently and is a great idea.
And the music....geez....even though Ifukube-sama didn't score the film, his riffs from previous films were taken up and edited in at such appropiate scenes. In fact the "Mothra vs. Godzilla" theme worked better in Gigan than in MvsG!!
Sorrow and hopelessness was excellently heightened by the music played in the background as Godzilla was been burned down by the tower, and Angilas' hopeless struggle against Gigan/Gidora
As for the communicating, I don't see anything wrong with that(I'm talking about the Japanese version that is) and the bubbles subtitled in Hiragana, doesn't really bother me either.
I guess what really pisses me off is when people lump this movie with the likes of Hedora and Megalon, when this film is way serious as opposed to those.
I find it hard to believe that you ranked King Kong vs. Godzilla higher. To me that's the second worst Godzilla movie. Godzilla looks horrible in most shots and Kong...I don't even need to say anything about him.. I could go on and on about this movie but........
thanks for taking the time to listen to my rants and raves
Well Jim, you take the time to read our rants, we might as well give you equal time. We're going to have to let our review of Godzilla vs Gigan stand on its own merit, though, and let folks decide for themselves.
I like all your reviews for your movies, they have been the most un-biased opinions of movies I have read. It's good to know what you can expect from a movie, rather than be tainted by someone's inexcusable write-off of it just because of some little prejudice they happen to have against any and all flicks of a particular genre.
I have a statement to make regarding the plot (?) of the movie "Eastern Condors".
As far as I have read from the inner sleve notes of the Laserdisc, and other plot summaries (and having watched the movie only once since getting it) - The movie tells of the "Dirty Dozen" that gets formed to act as a decoy to the proper strike-action force that gets delivered into the same area, so as to put the enemy off the real purpose of the whole mission. The real strike-action team gets either blown up or Missing In Action and the mission is called off, I guess because the Heads of Power think their decoy team couldn't pull the mission off. But the commanding officer goes down so as not to abandon his men, as well as to complete a vital mission.
I'm not sure where you could confirm this, other than reading the LD cover notes, or something. This might put a different light on the movie (not much, probably). Hope this helps.
We didn't get that impression in our viewing of Eastern Condors, but we suppose anything's possible. In any case, it doesn't much matter. They end up on the ground and what happens afterwards makes for pretty darn cool viewing.
RE: Spitfire
Guys, you were kind.Ê As a long-time fan of Mr. Henriksen I feel compelled to see everything he's done (please, no "obsessive-compulsive" comments, okay?Ê I know what I'm doing.Ê I'm in control of this.Ê I am.)ÊÊ Alas, this has left me in a state I can only describe as vegetative on any number of occasions.Ê Spitfire was certainly one of those occasions, one of the more notable as I recall.Ê About the only things I can remember, apart from how bored Lance looked, was that Tim wore a very nice lavender scarf for the last third of the film and Charlie's mother had the longest nipples I've ever seen in my life.Ê Oddly that didn't seem to enliven the opening scene, which I consider a bad sign. ÊÊÊ
A more, uh, successful outing with Pyun and Henriksen, if you can call anything Pyun does successful, can be seen if you rent "Knights."Ê It affords the considerable pleasure of watching Lance in an outfit that makes him look like a huge lobster, channelling Richard III, kissing birds (no, I mean real birds.) and spitting on everyone.Ê And the female lead is about a thousand times more interesting than Phillips.Ê Oh, and Kris Kristofferson gets torn in half.Ê I mean, how can you top that? ÊÊÊ Great site, btw. ÊÊÊ
Jean (off to watch Delta Heat again)
Sadly, our copy of Spitfire has long since returned to the mail-order rental shop, or we would watch it again to confirm the astounding nipple length of which you speak. (C'mon, you knew we'd pick this subject for our reply, didn't you?) While we are not, shall we say, nipple afficianados, we've seen enough bad movie nudity to know that this wasn't exactly the kind of nude scene one lingers over. You must have sensed this movie's awfulness in advance, thus your boredom and attention to such details. May we recommend Species?
I just happened upon the Tim Thomerson link you have on your web page and was surprised to find some interesting info. But a TRANCERS TV series? That's all we need. More lame syndicated sludge like CONAN (Arnold is gagging as we speak), TARZAN and anything that stars Fred Dryer. Oh wait... wasn't Thomerson in that too?!!
By the way, don't see US MARSHALS.
And if you rent THE RAPTURE, which someone unfairly slammed in a letter to you (it was an art house hit that got good reviews, though I don't care what the critics say), make sure you pick up the older VHS or LD. The new VHS and LD is letterboxed from a 1.85:1 soft matt. This means nudity seen in the old tape and disc, which wasn't supposed to be seen, is now cropped by the black bars. You now see what you saw in the cinema (follow?), but I'm sure David Duchovny and Mimi Rogers didn't want the full monty seen on screen.
Little care is used to transfer films to tape and the telecine guys figure, the more nudity, the better (though sometimes we see the actors are not really naked and have a sock around the bonk).
OH! Check out BULLETPROOF HEART for more Mimi style sex and nudity. That woman is racked. (and the film is decent too)
Oh Matt, you always come through for us. First those terrific tapes you sent, now these great facts about film nudity! (Hmmmm. It seems a trend is emerging in our letters...) At any rate, we'll be reviewing some of those films you sent real soon now... promise! No, really!
Much as I love Superman II (mostly for those great battle sequences) I'd have to give the title of the most enjoyable superhero movie ever made to The Rocketeer. An honorable mention goes to The Phantom, another underrated recent comic book flick, although it's not really in the same class as Superman II or Batman of '89.
Just in case you care.
Of course we care! And on your recommendation, we have rented and reviewed The Phantom, for your reading pleasure. Thanks for the letter!
Guys-
For a movie you call "great" and one of the "most entertaining superhero movies," you sure spend a lot of time (the bulk of the review) exposing its plot and logic holes--guys, try to remember this is a superhero, comic-book movie! I'm glad you liked the movie. It's one of my favorites (see my username ;). If you tried, I think you could do the same thing with a lot of other films.
I'm curious as to what the comment Reeve "still looks typecast" in the role of Supes/Clark Kent means. Maybe you meant, as a result of his famous and long association with the character, audiences and critics could never see him as anything else, but as Superman. It was always Superman does lovelorn playwright or Superman does dirty priest. Reeve was perfect as Superman; unfortunately people never wanted to stop reminding him that he was "Superman" and could do nothing else.
Perhaps we meant that he did it a little too perfectly. He was always such a comic-book dichotomy -- mild-mannered Clark Kent & ultrastud Superman. Even the comics have gotten over that these days. We much prefer Dean Cain's Superman to Mr Reeve's, although we've probably sealed our doom by saying so.
Plato wasn't gay.
Plato wanted a father who loved him.
Plato was f---in wierd, tho.
Well, Rob, you've certainly chosen the simplistic interpretation of Rebel Without A Cause. While that has merit, we're still of the opinion that a lot more was going on with Plato than was presented in the mere words of the dialogue.
RE: The Lonely Lady
There is no doubt that the worst film ever made was "Two Lane Blacktop" with Warren Oates and James Taylor. "The Lonely Lady" must be high quality entertainment in comparison.
In "Two Lane Blacktop" there are long periods of time when the two "stars" mentioned above ride along in a '57 Chevy (the real star of the show). After several minutes of no dialogue at all, Warren Oates turns to James Taylor and says "We're gonna have to get those spark plugs checked some". There follows several more minutes of film of the two driving along a rural highway.
And that was one of the better parts.
Loyal readers know that The Lonely Lady is our meter stick, by which all other bad movies are measured. Every once in a while, someone tries to challenge that standard, and all have, as of yet, failed. We will try to get our hands on Two Lane Blacktop and let you know the result.
Hey, I just wanted to congratulate you on your website. I've read most of your reviews and thoroughly enjoyed them. You write very well--something I'm afraid many of your competitors can't claim. As a general rule, I agree with most of your opinions, though I have to say I thought you were far too kind to that lame and boring waste of celluloid, "Screamers". (I know, I know, everybody's a critic.)
Anyway, I just wanted to say thanks for the entertainment!
Thanks for the kind words! We do try to entertain you wayward web-surfing souls...
Hi there,
I have a confession to make -- like you guys, I sometimes go out of my way to watch movies that I'm sure are going to be excruciatingly awful.
I particularly recommend "The Lair of the White Worm," which is, if I remember correctly, one of Hugh Grant's first films (it's a British movie). It also stars Amanda Donohoe (the lesbian lawyer from L.A. Law) as the High Priestess of the White Worm, who spends a great deal of the movie naked and painted blue with stripes and with yellow contact lenses, and (I think) Catherine Oxenburg, who eventually ended up on Dallas.
Lia, we're glad you confessed, and we forgive you. Scott has seen Lair and hasn't recommended it to Chris yet, but Chris thinks any film with a naked chick painted blue can't be all bad. We'll get back to you on that one.
Came to your site from Netsurf Digest and will visit again.
You need to look at a film called The Valley of Gwanjii (or something close to that). Includes one of the more memorable and improbable scenes on celluloid: James Franciscus in cowboy rig fighting a Tyrranosaurus Rex with a spear inside a cathedral in Mexico!!! (Significant borrows from King Kong, of course, but far worse).
Yeah, you're right Dave, that does sound like a... uh... "must-review" kinda film. Yeah. We'll get right on it.