STARRING: Robert DeNiro, Edward Burns, Kelsey Grammer and Melina Kanakaredes

Studios should not make any more movies about alcoholic cops chasing serial killers in New York City until they figure out how to do something new with the idea. Writer/director John Herzfeld ("2 Days in the Valley") has certainly not broken any new ground with the mundane "15 Minutes." The characters are stale, the story’s tired and if I see one more aerial view of Manhattan in a movie, somebody’s gonna get hurt.

Herzfeld tries to spice things up by also making this thriller a satire on the modern media, but his insights are about as fresh as last week’s milk. Celebrity cop Robert DeNiro hunts two Eastern European wackos planning to get rich and famous by selling videos of their heinous crimes to tabloid TV. Oooh, who knew TV news was exploitive? This tale of media-savvy killers is about as cutting edge as Kathy Lee Gifford.

The villains are pretty lame. They alternate between psychotic episodes and fits of dorky tourist euphoria. It’s like being stalked by a rabid Yakov Smirnoff. The heroes are better portrayed than the bad guys are, even if they’re little more than stock characters. DeNiro’s basically paying his phone bill with this one, but he still has moments. He exudes a weary charm in his scenes opposite Edward Burns ("The Brothers McMullen" and "Saving Private Ryan"), who plays a young, noble arson investigator.

I’m still trying to figure out how a fire marshal gets so fully enmeshed into a murder investigation, but what do I know? I learned everything I know about cops from watching movies and TV. Making Burns a fireman seems to be the director’s only attempt to breathe life into the comatose "old cop/young cop" storyline. He should have tried harder. DeNiro, Burns, and Kelsey Grammer (TV’s Frasier Crane enjoying a change of pace as a ratings-hungry news anchor) elevate this junk a little, but it’s still junk.

STARRING: Julia Roberts, Brad Pitt, James Gandolfini and Bob Balaban

The problem with movie stars is that their flicks often arrive in theaters with a helluva lot of baggage. When you see a big name on the marquee, you’re expecting — no, demanding — to be entertained. Like a movie star’s name about the title is some kind of seal of approval. But not every star can hit it out of the park every time. In their defense, does every movie with an A-list cast have to be an event?

Case in point: two mega stars recently let their hair down to make a quirky, romantic caper. "The Mexican" didn’t arrive with a lot of fanfare. It probably won’t win any Oscars. And I’m sure it won’t change anybody’s life. But this movie is one fun night at the movies. Julia Roberts and Brad Pitt cast off their movie star chains to play goofy, likable characters in a goofy, likable film.

Samantha and Jerry (Roberts and Pitt) are a squabbling couple on the verge of breaking up. Sam wants Jerry to quit his job and join her in a new life in Las Vegas. Jerry wants to make Sam happy, but he works for a crime boss who requires more than 2-weeks notice. If he wants out, Jerry has to first run down to Mexico and retrieve a valuable antique pistol.

Pitt’s Jerry is an endearing knucklehead who bungles the job and gets stuck south of the border. To ensure that Jerry completes his mission, a hitman (James Gandolfini from HBO’s "The Sopranos") is dispatched to kidnap Sam. Like Morgan Freeman in "Nurse Betty," Gandolfini’s Leroy is a most unconventional assassin. He is a sweet, romantic lunk who befriends Sam rather than terrorizing her.

While Leroy and Sam chat it up in Vegas, Jerry bumbles his way across Mexico, acquiring and losing the prized firearm several times until the film’s screwball conclusion. Pitt plays this role to dumbass perfection and both he and Roberts look like they’re having a lot of fun. Credit needs to go to writer J.H. Wyman and director Gore Verbinski ("Mouse Hunt") for keeping things light. A good time was had by all.

STARRING: Anthony Hopkins, Julianne Moore, Ray Liotta and Gary Oldman

"Hannibal" is a good movie — an engrossing modern gothic tale — but it’s not a "great" film. Director Ridley Scott ("Blade Runner" and "Gladiator"), following in the footsteps of the much-subtler Jonathan Demme, has concocted a queasy pop culture convection, but nothing more. The Oscar-winning "Silence of the Lambs" transcended its genre while this new one seems rooted in it. "Hannibal" has good acting, amazing cinematography and solid direction, but it’s not a classic.

I know it’s not fair to judge a film mainly by comparing it to another, but it’s inevitable in this case. First and foremost, "Hannibal" is a sequel to " Silence of the Lambs." If you’ve seen the first film, you can’t watch "Hannibal" without referencing it. To their credit, Scott and writers David Mamet ("State & Main") and Steven Zaillian ("Schindler’s List") crafted a story that you can follow without having viewed "Silence of the Lambs." However, this production is still haunted by its impressive predecessor.

In my opinion, "Silence of the Lambs" is a masterpiece. A thriller that not only provided chills, but great performances, a brilliant script and superb direction. It gave us two unforgettable characters entangled in such a bizarre and compelling relationship that it was impossible not to be mesmerized. Jodie Foster and Anthony Hopkins embodied their roles so completely that it felt like we weren’t watching actors, but the actual characters, onscreen.

Hopkins reprises his Oscar-winning role as Hannibal "The Cannibal" Lecter while Julianne Moore ("Boogie Nights") replaces Foster as FBI Agent Clarice Starling. They are both very good, but the performances don’t recapture the magic of the original. "Hannibal" picks up 10 years after the first film with Hannibal hiding out in Italy and Starling still on the case. The film takes its time to reunite the two characters, but once they’re together, races to its conclusion.

I enjoyed watching all the pieces click into place, but then the shift in pace bugged me. The filmmakers should have taken as much time resolving the story as they did establishing it. Regarding the ending, there is a shocking scene that will make you squirm, but it’s as fascinating and darkly humorous as it is grotesque.